Star Wars in real-life #1: What it (might) look like if Darth Vader went on a road trip

Have you ever wondered what it would look like if a Star Wars character would do something you do, deal or work with in real-life? We thought it might be a nice idea for a new series. And Eliza Cochrane was so kind to kick it off with her combination of her interest in the motorhomes business and Darth Vader planning a road trip!

Imagine the scenario: rumour has escaped that there’s a Jedi in hiding somewhere, a remnant of the days of the Republic, on an outer rim world; where constant hurricane-force winds in the stratosphere make conventional ground-to-surface flight impossible. The planetary surface is idyllic but vast…

The only way to the surface is through a shield gate (not unlike the Gate on Scarif in Rogue One). Vader has no choice but to take his own personal motorcaravan down to the surface, and hunt down one of the last of the Jedi knights.

What would the Sith Lord’s mode of transportation look like?

Well, given his affinity for the Lambda-class T-4a shuttle, I reckon it would look a little like this:

It would probably be manufactured by both Sienar Fleet Systems and Cygnus Spaceworks, the same manufacturers who constructed the Lambda shuttle; made out of the same trihedral foil design. As you can see, the cockpit and the navigation fin look virtually indistinguishable. Even the boarding ramps could be essentially the same parts, re-purposed from the shuttle for the motorcaravan.

This outer rim world, let’s call it Tantam (Latin for ‘vast’) is remote, under-populated, and lacking in the natural resources that the Galactic Empire wants. The people living there are poor, and there’s nothing of any particular worth or appeal that grows there.

In that case, Darth Vader will need to be prepared for a long voyage ‘on the road’. So it goes without saying that the inside of his motorhome would resemble a literal transplantation of the private quarters of his flagship star dreadnought the Executor.

Presuming the hunt takes place in-between Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi, Vader might have Han Solo on his person; might even take his frozen body along for the ride (a sort of sick joke, but also to make sure the Rebels don’t retrieve him).

And of course he will need some arrangements for eating – although I admit I don’t know how Darth Vader eats anything.

Joke’s aside, we all know the good in Vader was never entirely eradicated, or at least his love and longing for his wife Padmé – hence his picture on the wall. I get the feeling Padmé’s picture is Vader’s own little rebellion – that the Emperor would chastise Vader if he knew about it.

Everything else is business as normal: a meditation chamber for the long roads, set on autopilot. Spare clothes (the cloak carousel), an AI operated 3-D chess console – basically solitaire for when the high-speed winds temporarily disrupt all interference from the rest of the galaxy – and a conference table to entertain the holographic avatars of Imperial commanders whenever signal does return.

That’s what I think Vader’s motorcaravan would look like. Maybe he wouldn’t have one already made, but if he needed one, I’m sure the Empire could manufacture it quickly.

So, food for thought: if Darth Vader needed to go on the road for a lengthy period of time, what do you think his method of transport would be? Do you imagine it would look anything like how I’ve depicted here?

Let me know in the comments below.

Eliza Cochrane is a copywriter for We Buy Any Motorcaravan and a bit of a self-confessed geek. She has drawn motorcaravans for other pop-culture characters here, including The Joker; Daenerys (from Game of Thrones), Harry Potter, and more.

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